I remember / je me souviens
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For those limbic bursts of nostalgia, invented by Proust, miniaturized by Nicholson Baker, and freeze-dried by Joe Brainard in his I remember and by Georges Perec in his Je me souviens.

But there are no fractions, the world is an integer
Like us, and like us it can neither stand wholly apart nor disappear.
When one is young it seems like a very strange and safe place,
But now that I have changed it feels merely odd, cold
And full of interest.
          --John Ashbery, "A Wave"

Sometimes I sense that to put real confidence in my memory I have to get to the end of all rememberings. That seems to say that I forego remembering. And now that strikes me as an accurate description of what it is to have confidence in one's memory.
          --Stanley Cavell, The Claim of Reason


Saturday, December 21, 2024

I remember a scene in The Swiss Family Robinson where the young boy is bitten by a spider (the web has come up out of nowhere) and the father sucks out the venom and gouges out the wound with a knife before it can harm him.  A very scary scene, but it was interesting that I understood what he was doing almost immediately, without having any knowledge or expectation that this was something you could do.

This is another of the earliest movies I remember, and that I associate with the large-screened Upper West Side theaters I saw them in.  The juxtaposition of the large, somewhat threadbare theater and its smells with the slightly underlit movies you saw there is something that I am only conscious of now.  They may feel underlit (now: this was natural then) because when I was little we went during the day.  Or they may seem underlit as I remember them in comparison to today's bright flat screen TVs.  (I recollect The Planet of the Apes as underlit as well, though I remember seeing it much later in my childhood.) But that was fine -- the movie world seemed all the realer in being both very large and somewhat distant from the crowd in the grungy theater.



posted by William 7:55 AM
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Monday, September 02, 2024

I remember learning the word coincidence from my mother.  I don't remember what I was surprised by, but she said it was just a coincidence, and since I didn't know the word she explained it.  It seemed just wonderful that there was this benign term for how the world would sometimes get in synch with itself -- that two things should just come together cheerfully and wholly in the present.  She'd pointed out something lovely.



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Monday, August 26, 2024

 I remember my uptown grandmother getting seriously and surprisingly angry at me when at the age of 9 or so I mentioned (we were driving down Broadway from their house in Washington Heights (I remember we called our grandparents' apartments "houses")) -- surprisingly angry that I said I wanted to be president when I grew up.  She (they were refugees from the Nazis who had several hair-raising escapes) said that was absolutely inappropriate for a Jewish boy -- that people would hate me and would hate Jews even more than they already did if I or any other Jew were president.  



posted by William 9:03 AM
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Friday, August 09, 2024

I remember when Nixon resigned.  I was in the hospital after a water-skiing accident (thanks Doug) and the nurse (who had offered to sneak me beers) came in giddy with joy and said, "That wonderful man is going to resign today."  We watched him on TV (there were four patients in the room and the nurse).  Then the next day (fifty years ago today) we watched his self-pitying speech ("My mother was a saint") before he got on the helicopter.  It seemed like the country was going to get better now, and that the awful right was finally vanquished.



posted by William 9:20 AM
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Monday, May 20, 2024

 I remember how much easier it was when the pants and shoes I was wearing permitted me to slip my feet all the way through the cuffs without having to take off my shoes.



posted by William 3:54 PM
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Sunday, February 11, 2024

 I remember being surprised that the fronts and backs of coins were always upside down from each other.  At first I thought that this was random, but after looking at four or five coins, and flipping them over or turning them on their axels very slowly, I saw that this was a rule.  I am still not sure why.  (I learned this considerably after I learned to balance a coin on its side.)



posted by William 1:17 AM
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Wednesday, February 07, 2024

I remember being impressed and surprised that you could balance a coin on its side -- I idealized the coin as having only two surfaces -- and then a little later I remember being pleased that I was able to do it.  I remember that milled coins were slightly easier to balance on their sides than pennies or nickels.



posted by William 10:48 PM
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Tuesday, January 09, 2024

 I remember my father explaining to me when we were watching a James Bond movie -- one of the earlier ones with Sean Connery -- that a 0 on the roulette wheel meant you lost no matter whether you'd bet red or black, even or odd, etc. (and that this was how the house came out ahead).  Not longer after we got a toy roulette set and I saw there was a 0 and a double 0 on the plastic mat you could lay out to place your chips on.  But in the movie there was only a 0.  I assumed that the toy set was more accurate and that  probability of getting black or evens or whatever binary bet you made was 18/38 or 9/19 -- that is less than the a break-even 50%.  (Only recently did I learn that the 00 was an American innovation: in Monte Carlo they only have one 0).



posted by William 8:30 PM
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Thursday, January 04, 2024

 I remember water-cooler bottles at my father's office, where he'd sometimes take me when he had to work on Saturdays (during tax season).  I remember being surprised when a bunch of large bubbles (bigger than ping-pong balls) would burst up, and not understanding (as I guess I still don't) why the bubbles would only gurgle into the water every fifth or sixth cup of water, and not each time.



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